I’ve Been Duped

Don’t get me wrong, I feel better. I’m not nauseous all day, most of the time. I’m not puking 2-3x a day. It’s great. However, I was told that, on the morning of week 12, I would wake up, refreshed, renewed, de-nauseated.

I didn’t.

I woke up, and puked in the middle of the night.

I feel much better now, and I’m praying that will be the “last puke of the season.” At this point, however, I’m convinced I’ll be going at it for the next 6 months. It’ll never let up again. Even after I have the child. I will be puking daily for the rest of my life.

Symptom Check-in - Week 10

Well, this week has rocked. Seriously, rocked. I’ve never felt so not sick. I got to see my little one and I’m not quite as tired as I was. My face is looking slimmer, while my hips are beginning to stick out like a table…I guess I’m not entirely sure how I feel about that part.

I did, however, have three nights in a row this week where I awoke at 2:25am and yakked. I have no idea why, and it really came out of no where. Hasn’t happened since, though.

DOOF!

I am so hungry. I need food. The moment the nausea (daytime…nightime is a whole other story) passed, I began getting hungry. Hungry like I have never been before. I want to eat pizza and dulce de leche ice cream. Correction: I need to eat pizza and dulce de leche ice cream. I know cravings are normal, but I didn’t expect them this early.

A few ladies on Babycenter have mentioned how “well meaning” people keep “mentioning” what they’re eating may not be the best for the baby. I cannot imagine giving such advice unsolicited, and were someone to say anything of the sort to me, I may have to kill them.

Although, I do understand that ripping a person to shreds with a piece of pizza in your mouth and a carton of ice cream in your hand probably isn’t the best look for a new mother, I don’t think puking their suggested health food of the day all over their car isn’t such a bad thing. Right?

Symptom Check-in - Week 9

This week has been the greatest of all weeks - if you ignore the food poisoning. I’m not sure if I should be worried or not.

Symptom Check-in - Week 8

This week hasn’t been the worst. It was actually pretty dealable. I think I yakked once the whole week. It was great. You know you’re pregnant when your idea of an awesome day is one you spend disgustingly nauseous, but not throwing up.

Symptom Check-in - Week 7

Symptom Check-in - Week 6

This week has been the worst, thus far. Just the thought of things can make me nauseous. In fact, we were in the car on Thursday and I’d just imagined licking a lemon. My face suddenly self-contorted into the sour face, as if I really had just licked it. I was once able to watch the most disgusting of horror scenes in movies. Now, they make me nauseous. I was also once able to watch baby wipe commercials without sobbing like an infant, no longer! It really makes you feel like you’re going insane. I can’t imagine lasting another 5 weeks (or, God forbid, more) feeling like this.

Symptom Check-in - Week 5?

Oh the joy, the joy! Tuesday is our dating ultrasound, so the question marks on weeks will disappear and the symptom posts will be more regular.

Beginning with my last check-ins symptoms, followed by new stuff!

• Acid reflux
• Lightheadedness
• Getting breathless going up the stairs
• Backache
• Very nearly Puking…no longer very nearly.
• Having a severe aversion to the smell of cooking beef. Could it smell any worse?!?
• Feeling as if I have the flu, complete with sneezing, runny nose and sore throat.
• Consitpation still exists but is on a timetable. I’m constipated for three days, then have diarrhea. Lovely.
• Constant thirst leading to…
• Half my day spent peeing or needing to pee
• Bloating, like on a period only much, much worse.
• Gas! Oh my Lord, the gas….
• Being so dead tired I’m already ready to go to bed and I only awoke 4.5 hours ago.
• Morning sickness….morning freaking sickness.

I’m convinced they call in morning sickness because it starts at 12:01am and ends and 12:00:59am. The nausea never ends. The only way to keep it at bay is by eating, constantly. Anyone who tells you saltines work, is lying. THEY’RE LYING! They only make you more nauseous, more thirsty, and, therefore, having to pee more often. Bananas, however, do work. I’m eating about 4 a day. They have a high level of B6 in them, which is what I’m convinced is keeping everything at bay. I also tried taking a B6 when waking up this morning, and today’s been a really good day. So, I’m hoping I found another weapon in the fight against Morning-noon-afternoon-evening-night sickness. I’m not sure I can put up with another 7 weeks of this, and that’s only if things go well. Otherwise, I may be feeling this way the next 7.5 months. You can knock me out if that happens.

Actually, you can knock me out starting now. Really, go for it….I’ll pay you….

Losing Blood and Belly

Wednesday was my first full day of morning sickness. It NEVER went away. The nausea was under the surface no matter what I did. It didn’t help that we were off looking for houses and the realtor drove a little crazy. I had to stop and get saltines or I would’ve yakked all over the backseat of his rental van. I also developed a strange heart palpitation at night, that we thought was thanks to all the cheese I’d eaten - I’m lactose intolerant.

Thursday, I woke up more nauseated than I’ve ever been. We still made it to my appointment, but an half an hour late, because I’d written it down as 10 instead of 9:30. They were very sweet, however, because my doctor is just really sweet and so is every single member of her staff.

Eric came in with me, and barely batted an eyelash when he saw me lay my pee on the counter. Want to get your man used to seeing your pee sitting on tabletops? Use Dollar Store pregnancy tests! They took my blood pressure, and my usual “blood pressure of the dead” is elevated - already listed on the “Things to be Grounded for” list. The nurse laughed at our amount of home testing, and then said, “well, you’re definitely pregnant.” That was a little surreal.

My wonderful doctor came in and congratulated us. That was weird! I sound so immature, I am..I’m a baby. What am I doing having a kid? I’m an only child! I won’t be the baby anymore! People will expect me to be responsible. I can’t handle this!

…..Sorry. Fetal position crying session over…

She went over a million questions about history, discussed the blood tests I’d need, and handed the blood work paperwork over to Eric. She left and let me dress in a CLOTH butt showing gown. Eric held my clothing while she did the whole specuulum thing.
“A little uncomfortable…ow…there, Eric?”
“No, I’m just worried about the whole blood thing.”
“There’s no blood right now…” I knew he meant the blood work to be done later in the afternoon.
The doctor responded with, “Not for a few more months! Then it’s all over!” His eyes got about 2 feet tall.

We talked about hospitals and natural birth, which she completely supported and seemed almost excited for me about. She said I should look at out of network hospital costs and suggested a hospital that heavily supported epidural-free birth. I really love my doctor. She also said my heart palpitations were thanks to my levothyroxine. I need my dose upped.

As we left, they handed us a heavy bag full of Enfamil, Similac, prenatals, paperwork and magazines. That was the moment it hit me. A baby was coming…and it was coming home with me…What the hell am I doing raising a kid?! I can’t….wait, we’ve already been through this…

We went down and got bloodwork from the BEST tech that ever existed. She got 5 vials out of me without anything more than the first prick. She didn’t move the needle once. Eric even watched and didn’t pass out. Her name was Wendy, and she will be drawing my blood from now on or I won’t go!

I have my first ultrasound on Tuesday that will tell me how far along I am. I’ll also get my bloodwork results then. I’m completely excited, and nervous…and what the HELL am I going to do with a kid?!

We went to eat afterwards, and I got about half of my salad down before I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I walked as quickly as I could to the bathroom, and managed to walk in right behind a woman with her daughter. I thought, “Okay, I’ll just hold it in. I’ll pee first, wait till they leave, then puke.” Who ever thought you couldn’t convince your body to not throw up when it wants to? I had barely locked the door when….bluaghhhhhhh. The poor woman kept telling her daughter to hurry up with every horrible vomit noise I would make — which are impossible to stifle, by the way! I wanted to run out and scream, “I swear, I’m not bulimic and I’m not going to get your child sick! I’m pregnant! It’s not my fault!” I felt awful.

However, I’ve learned that eating all day will keep you from puking. A piece of toast, a banana an hour later, maybe some oatmeal in another hour, it keeps everything from coming up. If you wait to eat, though, until you begin to feel nauseas, you will puke and it will not be pretty…but you will feel better. So what does one do? Get fat or puke all the time? Me? I’m going the fat route!

We bid on a house. It’s adorable, and my parents didn’t freak out nearly as much as I thought they would. Still, the house is just yet another thing for me to stress about and I’m simultaneously scared to death that we’ll get it, and that we won’t. Sometimes I feel in way too far over my head. Other times, I’m completely calm and happy about the choices we’ve made. I’m not sure how to deal with any of this right now. It’s all overload. I know I can handle it, because I have to. It’s just really scary. Really, really, really scary.

I complained too much, and it ran away

My reflux has disappeared. I’m worried and scared, probably unnecessarily so but I am. I’ve read it’s normal that certain days you just won’t feel pregnant, and it’s fine. I don’t think it’s fine to suddenly not feel pregnant. I’m trying to be level headed and realize everything is probably okay, but what if, just what if, it’s not?

I made my appointment with my OBGYN (who does not “practice her love with me”) this morning. The nurse asked me when my last period was, as they don’t generally see people before 8 weeks. I launched into an explanation about levothyroxine, hypothyroidism and missing periods. I was responded to with a very sweet, “Okay, sweetie, but when was your last menstrual period?”
“August 22nd…”
“Oh…well, the doctor’s on vacation this week and the earliest we can get you in is Thursday next week. At another hospital.”

I guess my missed period worked in my favor because I’m now able to go in earlier than most people would. God knows I need to, I’m already planning on buying a test for every day until the appointment, so I can be sure everything’s okay.

That “Things to Be Grounded For” list has just upped itself to 2.